Why should litigation be allowed to make a break- up even worse than it need be?
I know many solicitors who don’t want litigation as the divorce solution. They are prepared to work with me towards a smooth transition. In Brighton there is a group of professionals – (a collaborative networking group) who work towards better solutions for us all.
At the moment I see more people once they have come through the legal process of divorce or separation. But I have also seen people who have managed to keep a reasonable relationship going throughout the process. It makes an enormous difference. Firstly if there are children concerned there is an obvious need for continued collaboration for some years which needs consideration. Children don’t get divorced; you probably don’t want them to feel like that either. But even with no children involved, why should you not want minimum conflict in your break- up. Can it be as civilised as possible?
So who says that is easy?
We are at our most vulnerable when things aren’t going well: destabilised, hurt, confused, angry, remorseful, guilty. It’s a time we need support. Divorce is bound by legal considerations but the decision to divorce or separate is a psychologically emotional event, often for more than just the two people seemingly involved.
At a first meeting – see my blog post Working together towards a good divorce:free session –1.9.11, I am suggesting that you see me, along with a solicitor trained in collaborative practice, as your first step. In this first session it is a time to talk about your hopes and fears and what you want to achieve as well as discussing your legal position. You will be seeing two supportive professionals together to show you different options before opting for litigation, for example mediation or collaborative practise. With better planning, and a measured approach achieving your goals may not seem so far away.